I have received an email asking me what my medical conditions are that limit me to not be able to work. Well, currently I have been diagnosed with Epilepsy, Fibromyalgia, two forms of Arthritis, and Depression. Individually none of these would be all that limiting for me but unfortunately they each interact with each other and it is a none stop circle of pain and issues. For five years now I have also been having one infection after another, some more serious then others and most employers don't like it when you have to call in sick every other week. I live in pain day after day from head to toe, it never goes away. I could take pain medications the Dr.'s prescribe me but then I would be so doped up all the time I would not be able to take care of my children or drive a car. I do try to continue to do physical therapy as much as I can, however when you do not have a real income or any medical insurance it is almost impossible to do this.
Five years ago I got a sever bladder infection... which should have been no big deal so I went to the doc and got meds and thought I would be better. Instead the infection did not go away even with multiple doses of antibiotics. They even placed me in the hospital and used IV antibiotics. After almost two years of this infection getting so severe that I was even peeing pure blood, it finally went away with no real reason. During that time I also had to endure having a camera place up my urethra and multiple hospital stays. I thought after the infection went away at least I could finally get on with life but instead I suddenly got a severe yeast infection, which is actually quite normal after being on antibiotics for a long period of time. Again, this should have not been a big deal but it would not go away and kept getting worse, then I finally did not have a yeast infection but instead I had a full blown infection in my uterus. I bled non stop for months, I had multiple Dr. visits until finally my Dr. decided it could not keep going since I was becoming severely anemic, so she removed my uterus. This is called a historectomy, however in my case it was only a partial since they left my ovaries. Since then I have had infections in my eyes, ears, nose, throat, toes, kidneys, lungs, bladder, and intestines, you would think that this would mean I have a low immune system but according to the infectious disease Dr. there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with me. Most recently they have found a dark spot on my right lobe in my lung, we do not know what it is caused from but they want to sit and wait to see if it grows before doing anything else. My grandmother died of lung cancer, my grandfather died of prostate cancer, my cousin died of lymphatic caner at my age, and almost all of the other close relatives on my father's side of the family have died from one form of cancer or another. I worry of course but what more can I do so I sit and wait and hope the Dr. is doing what is right. I have attempted to work a few times over the many years since my divorce but only to get so sick that I can't work and then get fired for low attendance. I have tried finding work from home but this is not an easy task, I have tried answering questions which at only two cents per question made me no money, I have tried finding a job answering phone calls for Dr offices and such but could not find any positions. I have also applied for one reputable company only to get turned down because I had a misdemeaner theft from when I was 18, and mind you people I am now 34 and yet this still was the reason why they denied me. I have many ideas for business I could guarantee would make a ton of money but of course you have to have money to make money, I will go over my ideas in some other blog some other time. My credit was totally screwed when I was married due to both of our stupidity. Anyways, back to the original subject; I am sick almost all the time, when I am not sick I am in pain and when I am not in pain well those days never happen. I miss the days when I was healthy and could swim everyday and camp and hike and ride bikes and all the many other activities I use to enjoy, however I do the best I can to keep up with my kids, keep my house clean and live day to day.
This is a blog that is being made so that everyone has a place to discuss REAL thoughts that go through everyone's minds. Good, Bad, Ugly, or Beautiful thoughts on everything from politics, religion, medical care, and even just everyday life.
About me and why I started this blog!
I want to give you all the information about me so noone can come along and try to tell you things about me and try to tell you I am holding back. I cannot cover everything so of course as people ask me questions I will be happy to answer any and all questions about myself. I ask that people do not ask questions about my children because even though I will blog about life as a mother I hope to keep my children out of this blog. Anyways, I am a single mother of two awesome children. I am 34 years old and I do not work because of 4 different illnesses that I have. I do not say I am disabled because technically since I am not receiving disability the government says that means I am not disabled. I would beg to differ with them but I am not sure anyone will ever listen. I pay my bills by having assistance from the government, it is not truly enough to live life the way most Americans do but it is enough to give my kids a roof over their heads, clothes on their backs and food in their bellies. I have to say that I am writing this blog even though I will have many people who look down on me, and even though many people I know including my own family will have many issues with things I have to say here. I have reached a point in my life where I do not care, everyone else seems to think they can talk about me and run me down and treat me like crap because I am nice and sweet. This part of my life is done, I will no longer give people a second chance to hurt me, I will no longer not sit back and say anything in order to not hurt them but to continue to hurt me! I have a lot to say about the people in my life, about politics...oy oy oy, and about religion and so many other things in this world. I hope that there will be others that agree with me but honestly I do not care if there are not any that agree with me. I also hope that maybe this will end up coming across the eyes of some people in our system, and they will actually take time to understand and see, and maybe just maybe my words can make a difference somewhere along the way!
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